progress, pressure and personal effects

I knew the day would come when I would look up at my calendar and think "Oh my God, I have three weeks left in Kolkata. Besides some serious jewelry shopping, what have I accomplished?" That day has come.

Actually--and quite shockingly I might add--I'm happy with my progress. Despite delays of all stripes (health, heat, lack of motivation, monsoon goo water etc.), my research has been chugging along pretty well. I have what will hopefully be a solid M.A. project in my hands and I am definitely going to try and publish a version of it in the future along with a friend. I am finally in the data collection phase after weeks of planning, observation and library research. I've also learned a lot of stuff in both the personal and professional spheres, although the line gets awfully blurry when you aspire to live and work for social justice. Being alone so often has allowed me time to reflect and ask myself some hard questions about class, caste, poverty, privilege, justice, love, God and footwear.

Hmm... perhaps I shouldn't get so reflective. I still have almost a month left and a lot to get done before then.

Bad news: my uncle had a serious heart attack a couple of weeks ago and will have to undergo heart surgery this week. We are good friends and he's in my thoughts constantly. I also lost my cell phone, a film camera, a fleece jacket, and a fancy dupatta all in one week. I think I am hitting my end-of-summer stress phase and losing my mind and possessions under the weight of much self-induced pressure. This happened last summer too (cross ref. weblog post entitled "The Evil Smurfs Under My Bed," Aug. 2005).

Good news: my friend Monisha is here in Kolkata for several days and we have been enjoying our time together. We were both going a little nutso. She's just returned from her two months of environmental field work in the forests of northeast India, teeming with elephants.

Must run. Have to make some calls from a phone booth (the shame!).

-TKP